Do you support same-sex marriage?
This post at Glamour and the recent announcement by Barack Obama, our President, throwing his personal support behind same-sex marriage prompted me to share my opinion.
I have had a support badge for White Knot on my blog for eons. I’m not even sure when I first put it up. Nor am I sure when I started supporting gay marriage. I was raised by a Pagan mother with a father who was more hippie then anything else. They both had friends from all walks of life, especially my mother. I have always, and will always, support the offbeat out there. They march to their own drummer. I love offbeat and oddball characters. Perhaps because I am one.
But how lucky am I? I am getting married, legally married, to the person I love most in this world. Without gay marriage in the USA there are vast amounts of people out there that haven’t even gotten the chance to acquire anything even remotely resembling marriage with their loved one.
I try not to post anything too radical (though I keep saying that an awful lot lately and yet I still am) but I must say something now when my wedding is so close as I do support gay marriage. I have for a long long time. I see it as the next big civil rights hurdle (unless the Tea Party drags women back to fight the Feminist Movement kicking and screaming!). Everyday more people understand what this is really about.
At the end of the day marriage is about a civil contract between two consenting adults. How do I know this? Because my last contract was deemed null and void. He took advantage of all the rights that are granted upon marriage and abused it. He left me no choice but to break the contract. I even – briefly – dated a guy who should have been more honest with me. He didn’t tell me that the rights and power one individual has over another in marriage meant he didn’t believe in the institution at all. I felt betrayed once discovering that. Even with the betrayals I had in my first marriage. I still truly believe in marriage.
There are a lot of legal rights that come into play when calling it a marriage. And frankly I think it is absurd that 2 consenting adults, gay, straight, queer, whatever, can not sign the dotted line with each other and grant these rights to their chosen. That is the point of marriage. The idea that you must love them, well, that’s recent in history (Victorian actually) and just a very nice perk and/or motivation for doing the whole marriage thing. It certainly does involve a lot of trust with the other person.
Societal changes can be so slow you hardly notice or fast enough that you wonder what the heck happened. Though I am unsure which this is at this time I know that it must be done and should be done. In this country with so many opportunities and rights this is one amazing hurdle we can, and need to, get over.